From Yahoo -- 13 things a waiter won't tell you. I don't agree with them all; for example I often order "off menu". A restuarant that cannot go "off menu" has precooked the food and is likely no good. As for the rest, well, we all get sick and one day will die so, stop worrying and eat up!!!
1. Avoid eating out on holidays and Saturday nights. The sheer volume of customers guarantees that most kitchens will be pushed beyond their ability to produce a high-quality dish.
2. There are almost never any sick days in the restaurant business. A busboy with a kid to support isn't going to stay home and miss out on $100 because he's got strep throat. And these are the people handling your food.
3. When customers' dissatisfaction devolves into personal attacks, adulterating food or drink is a convenient way for servers to exact covert vengeance. Some waiters can and do spit in people's food.
4. Never say "I'm friends with the owner." Restaurant owners don't have friends. This marks you as a clueless poseur the moment you walk in the door.
5. Treat others as you want to be treated. (Yes, people need to be reminded of this.)
6. Don't snap your fingers to get our attention. Remember, we have shears that cut through bone in the kitchen.
7. Don't order meals that aren't on the menu. You're forcing the chef to cook something he doesn't make on a regular basis. If he makes the same entrée 10,000 times a month, the odds are good that the dish will be a home run every time.
8. Splitting entrées is okay, but don't ask for water, lemon, and sugar so you can make your own lemonade. What's next, grapes so you can press your own wine?
9. If you find a waiter you like, always ask to be seated in his or her section. Tell all your friends so they'll start asking for that server as well. You've just made that waiter look indispensable to the owner. The server will be grateful and take good care of you.
10. If you can't afford to leave a tip, you can't afford to eat in the restaurant. Servers could be giving 20 to 40 percent to the busboys, bartenders, maître d', or hostess.
11. Always examine the check. Sometimes large parties are unaware that a gratuity has been added to the bill, so they tip on top of it. Waiters "facilitate" this error. It's dishonest, it's wrong-and I did it all the time.
12. If you want to hang out, that's fine. But increase the tip to make up for money the server would have made if he or she had had another seating at that table.
13. Never, ever come in 15 minutes before closing time. The cooks are tired and will cook your dinner right away. So while you're chitchatting over salads, your entrées will be languishing under the heat lamp while the dishwasher is spraying industrial-strength, carcinogenic cleaning solvents in their immediate vicinity.
2 comments:
Jim, I once interviewed a veteran cocktail waitress who described a plethora of ways, some of them really creative, that bartenders and servers use to rip-off customers and the house alike. It turns out the establishment owner/manager has to act like a very diligent compliance officer at a very shady brokerage house.
Nice list.
A good friend of mine has been a waiter then manager at one of downtown Toronto's establishment restaurant bars for decades. He's offered a number of tips over the years about the way he increased his tips beyond just doing good service, making the kids happy so the parents are happy and tip big.
The main thrust of his lessons were ways waiters tried to increase the bill so that the percentage-based tip was correspondingly higher. This went double with alcohol.
- Get drink orders in first as soon as they sit down. With 4 people that's already a bill of $20-$28 and a tip of $2-$6 before they've barely arrived
- offer sparkling water before they ask for water so that a bottle can sit on the table
- for all bottled drinks (water, wine), always top up glasses when half done. It's amazing how quickly a bottle can be emptied and a new one ordered
- always suggest the second or third most expensive wine on the menu (depending on how long the wine list). Seems to show you are making a solid recommendation of a good wine but not gouging them. Alter this rule based on estimate of clientele.
- same rule for food if asked what's good
- always offer appetizers and deserts (an obvious one)
- before asking for next course orders, ask for drinks
- serve the desert first then coffees. People will leave as soon as the desert is all done, but will linger over after dinner drinks/coffees and order a second or third even while they wait for others at the table to finish.
- and a good litigators trick too: always lead with assumptions instead of real questions and certainly never open-ended questions. "Appetizers first?" "Will that be some sparkling water?" "I'll get you another bottle?" "A coffess with your desert, sir?"
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